can you help me? can you give me advices to be less worried about going bf in public?

I think it's easier (less judgement) for a female to walk (and run) around in public than a male.

Also, I am nearsighted, so I never see the expressions on people's faces (or street signs). I've trained my mind to just look ahead and focus on what I have to. I walk (and ran) around barefoot oblivious to what others think. Perhaps you could avoid looking into people's faces long enough to build up your courage and confidence. Then, if you do see a sour look, just smile and ignore it.
 
Just go out barefoot and don't worry about the looks and comments. Smile and just act normal (which you are doing). Ignore the negative comments, keep a positive attitude. Enjoy the comments that you do get. Kids are great. For a while avoid going into stores, but when you do, start with retail stores. I've never had a problem. I would guess from other posters here that the most problems happen at restaurants, cafes, or gyms. Dress casual, not too grubby and not too dressed up. A suit with bare feet is a weird combination that would draw attention. From my experience, most people don't even look down at the feet. Go for it.
 
I think it's easier (less judgement) for a female to walk (and run) around in public than a male.

Also, I am nearsighted, so I never see the expressions on people's faces (or street signs). I've trained my mind to just look ahead and focus on what I have to. I walk (and ran) around barefoot oblivious to what others think. Perhaps you could avoid looking into people's faces long enough to build up your courage and confidence. Then, if you do see a sour look, just smile and ignore it.

i think the same girls are like less judged

indeed but im more concerned about insults etc, i cant avoid to hear lol i thought about going with mp3 in streets while doing it you think its good idea?

If you SMILE REAL BIG!!! Others will smile back.

but fake smiles are not cool :/ i only feel like smiling in few ocassions when i force it i feel very fake i rather prefer the other person to not like me with a serious face than to like me because of my fake smile

also its funny cause in reality no one likes an unsincere grin, thats what "how to make friends and influence people" teach, the book teachs that as long as is genuine is great for relations, very good, but fake smiles have the opposite effect,
if someone like to smile he/she feels good he laughs a lot etc cool but people like me that doesnt feel like smiling too often have to force to smile to smile often

"a lot of times people smile only because they are suppposed to smile, not because they want to" thats a quote from a web i saw, and its so true, so many people do fake smiles

eminem is so badass he rarely smile in interviews while the others are laughing, thats so brave and awesome, he only smile and laugh when he truly wants to

another reason people smile is because they problably matched it with happiness and they want to feel happy so they force to smile, but that not tend to be very efficient in my opinion because you can be happy while being serious and in fact faking a smile can make you feel bad, the opposite, at least for me, a real smile feels good but a fake aint cool, however maybe some people feel good when they force to smile i dont know

an example of fake smile is this video

that smile so fake lol

lol so much comment for the smile thing

Just go out barefoot and don't worry about the looks and comments. Smile and just act normal (which you are doing). Ignore the negative comments, keep a positive attitude. Enjoy the comments that you do get. Kids are great. For a while avoid going into stores, but when you do, start with retail stores. I've never had a problem. I would guess from other posters here that the most problems happen at restaurants, cafes, or gyms. Dress casual, not too grubby and not too dressed up. A suit with bare feet is a weird combination that would draw attention. From my experience, most people don't even look down at the feet. Go for it.


ignoring is difficult for some people, thanks for the comment, but i think what really worries me is if someone laugh at me or insults me, because that way my pride and honor would be in danger, and i would have to say something to the person and maybe it turns into fight etc

a similar thing happend to a friend, he was wearing a hippy trouser, and a guy laugh at him, he (who was an amateur boxer like me, we were gym friends) felt hurt and he punched him, the police came and he had to paid 2000€ of fine to the guy

i wouldnt go to that extreme as easily as him, my friend was hot head or hot headed

however if someone says "nasty" or "disgusting" or is shocking or dissaproves it or "oh is barefoot" or something like that it would be ok, also i consider it kind of funny and kind of like the attention (i feel a little embarrassed but at the same time like the attention), but what worries me is if they bully me, insult me, make fun of me, etc
because i would have to be forced to argue with him and the tension can end in fight or something

thats why having mp3 can help i mean if i dont hear it then my pride is ok no matter how much the person insults me
, even if i have the mp3 stopped, faking that im listening to music while im not and i can hear everything

that way my pride would be ok, because im supposed to not hear it
 
i didnt understood the inwards and outwards

yes little by little helps


Sorry i talk in riddles sometimes.

Look outwards to learn more about the social issues that are holding you back rather than looking inwards, fearing them and getting frustrated.

There will always be critics and bullies, there's nothing you can do about that, just the same as there are introverts and extroverts, what some people find easy others find impossible.

The solution that works for me is compromise, i don't see it as a weakness but an intelligence. The most important thing is that you're happy in yourself. Hope that helps.
 
Most of the time, I doubt anyone would criticize you, except for, possibly, your mom or your grandmother!

Haha! More than likely, people will be surprised or curious and express their surprise. If I am reading your concern appropriately, I, like you, started out being wary of being different though I really wanted to try being barefoot. So I started slowly and discreetly. Initially, I just went outside but stayed close to home. The places that went to had few people walking around, especially people I might know. If I met someone who I did know, I tried to be very casual about. It helps to have a ready response if they ask why you are barefoot. I sometimes said it was something I was trying because I heard it was good for your legs and your feet. Especially if you are running, it's easy to say you are trying it, that you are enjoying it, and that if running barefoot gets you out for more exercise, then it's well worth it. If they suggest that it is hazardous, you can say that you are very careful about where you step!

As you get out more and more, and as neighbors and family see you barefoot more, they get used to it and so will you. Eventually, they accept it even if they think you are strange! I accept the part! You should accept it too.
 
No one said anything about "fake" smiles. I have real joy in my life; and especially when I am shoeless, I am likely to be smiling. That said, I have learned that when you ask for advice, you are seeking something to shoot down, and I am done giving you advice. If you are so miserable you cannot put on a smile, then wear your Nikes with disdain. Enjoy!
 
OK, one more take on the smile issue.

Your body doesn't know if you're faking a lot of the time. If you put on the smile, your body responds with good juices and muscular effects throughout. Just like if you go out all tensed up, even if it's "fake," your body is primed to respond with fear or other adrenaline pumped actions.

Other people are keyed to respond to smiles, too. The human brain processes faces faster than the background information it's taking in. Faces are special. They often smile back before they know they've done it.

When I run I check my posture, my breathing, my cadence, my smile, and then just lean into enjoying the running awhile before checking again.

...

On the bigger picture of how you find yourself in all this:

1. Try to realise that not nearly as many people give a damn as you might think or fear. They're too wrapped up in their own heads.

2. Follow the ancient wisdom "F*CK'M IF THEY CAN"T TAKE A JOKE!" and just get on with doing the best you can in this life.

Peace, friend!
 
I don't think people should wear ear phones and listen to music, etc., if they are out running where they could be hurt by a car or attacked by someone.
 
No one said anything about "fake" smiles. I have real joy in my life; and especially when I am shoeless, I am likely to be smiling. That said, I have learned that when you ask for advice, you are seeking something to shoot down, and I am done giving you advice. If you are so miserable you cannot put on a smile, then wear your Nikes with disdain. Enjoy!


yes but by definition is fake smile i think
i dont think anyone feels like smiling so much time as to walk smiling almost constantly while walking,
i have too
but its true, so many people do fake smiling, and i'd not be miserable i'd only be real, deep down no one likes fake smiles and also people tend to loss respect and dont like fake, anyone who do fake smiles will loss a lot of respect from others

its not for shoot down i didnt wanted to hurt but i want to be logical and also ive read a lot of these subjects


I don't think people should wear ear phones and listen to music, etc., if they are out running where they could be hurt by a car or attacked by someone.
no no but i mean like going with fake mp3, to act like you didnt hear what others said, what do you think about that barefoot TJ?


i'll answer the rest next day i got no time now, also having to respond to anyone gives me a little procrastination to me im kind of lazy with it
 

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