When to give up on a spouse

[Tristan]

I'm not sure if you've talked about his problems before and I missed it but I would think its hard for us to give specific advice without knowing more exactly what his injuries and issues are. I mean barefoot running is great and all, but I don't think its necessarily going to cure every possible leg and foot issues that one could have. I don't know much about Altas but maybe they arent working for him? I've tried some minimalist shoes that didnt work out to well also.

As for going minimal part time, well I suppose everyone might handle that differently. I don't have any issues, for the first half year I pretty much was only minimalist/bf when I ran or at home. And I still routinely wear very maximal steel toed, steel plated, kevlar lined, several pound boots.

But I know about stubborn SOs. My wife often complains about her feet. And her mom is a PT and specializes in sports injuries. Unfortunately she is of the 'you need more support' crowd. Her latest advice for my wife is those super thick soled shape up things. And my 6 yr old's shoes have thicker soles than almost any pair of shoes I've had, and weigh more than most of mine.

 

[NickW]

I'm not sure if you've talked about his problems before and I missed it but I would think its hard for us to give specific advice without knowing more exactly what his injuries and issues are. I mean barefoot running is great and all, but I don't think its necessarily going to cure every possible leg and foot issues that one could have. I don't know much about Altas but maybe they arent working for him? I've tried some minimalist shoes that didnt work out to well also.

Some people that have worn ill fitting shoes for so long do not know when a shoe does not fit right. It could be that the Altras don't fit right for his specific foot shape and could be causing him problems. My Altra Adams don't fit me well, but back when I bought them way long time ago I thought they fit my foot shape just fine. It could be possible that he may need something like the Merrell BF line or maybe the New Balance Minimus series. For me, New Balance fits well because they have a wider midfoot where Merrell is tighter in the midfoot. In any case he may just need help learning what fits right and what doesn't. Don't push him too hard, my wife does this and causes lots of arguments because she doesn't understand when I've shut down and stopped listening and am at the point of just getting angry. Anyhow, good luck and I hope you can find a minshoe that fits him well that he will have better luck with.

 

[JosephTree]

RW, you tried to use your womanly magical powers? No wonder it had a poor outcome.

 

[rickwhitelaw]

Ha Ha, place foot in mouth again. No, when it come to withholding something, we all know who is going to win.

I have to be careful. At yesterday's PTA bookfair, I noticed the give away prizes. I exclaimed "oh, you have a cookbook for a prize?" All looked at me funny and I said "I take that back, no other dad has said that, right?" I said in a much deeper voice "I mean, you don't have a book about guns or tractors to give away?" I prance around barefoot in short shorts and now express interest in cookbooks. I'm a gettin' run out of this valley for sure now.

 

[PatrickGSR94]

I love cook books, nothing wrong with that. I've always been one to do more cooking in our home than my wife does.

 

[Agnesd]

The problem isn't what shoes to put him in, the problem is he has issues with foot pain in his regular shoes and he wanted to give minimalist shoes a try, but didn't really give them a chance or transition correctly. He hasn't given it any time or effort to strengthen his feet. He just wants to have any fix be instant, which is exactly what won't happen. It's just like anything else, "What can I get to fix this?" instead of "What can I DO to fix this?"

I agree that I cannot push him, he will just get mad and not listen at all. He's the one who suggested trying zero drop, so I just thought we were getting somewhere. When he complains about his aches and pains, I'll just frown and nod, and say, "Huh, that sucks. I'm sure you'll figure it out." (practicing right now)

By the way, there's nothing wrong with a guy who cooks - it's every woman's dream. =)

 

[Barefoot Dama]

By the way, there's nothing wrong with a guy who cooks - it's every woman's dream. =)

Amen sister!

 

[Barefoot TJ]

My hubby's cooking right now! Hee!

I'm sick though, so that's kinda why.

 

[Bare Lee]

I prance around barefoot in short shorts and now express interest in cookbooks. I'm a gettin' run out of this valley for sure now.

Yah, I bought a pair of Brooks Infinity IIIs or something because they dry quickly so you can wash them out in the shower and have them good to go on your next run without having to wait for laundry day, but my wife has given me a lot of grief for wearing short shorts. And it's true, it's not really my style, but I appreciate the convenience. Just got a couple of regular sweat shorts in clearance at Target. I like cooking too and did a lot during my prolonged bachelorhood, but now that I'm married and my wife likes her own cooking a lot more than mine, I rarely get to practice my admittedly limited repertoire. I could see making a study of it in the future when life isn't so overwhelming.

 

[Last Place Jason]

RW, you tried to use your womanly magical powers? No wonder it had a poor outcome.

This is how my wife gets me to do stuff. Works like a charm.

 

[NickW]

By the way, there's nothing wrong with a guy who cooks - it's every woman's dream. =)

Then I know my wife is very happy because I do ALL the cooking in our house.

 

[clawhammer72]

I love cook books, nothing wrong with that. I've always been one to do more cooking in our home than my wife does.

Me too.

 

[Agnesd]

My husband shares the cooking duties. You guys are all awesome

Update on the husband - went for a walk today with the dogs around the neighborhood. My husband in his Brooks, me in my bare feet. I could tell he kept looking at me funny, but wasn't saying anything. My dog was whining (he does that a lot when he doesn't have tennis ball) so I started running with him, then my husband started running behind me. First of all, I left him behind. Second, I could hear him stomping behind me. Then he tells me "Watch out for the glass in the road!" as I was already nimbly hopping around it. I didn't point any of this out, just kept my mouth shut.

Someone said earlier, just wait till he gets competitive. I think that's it. I'll just keep my mouth shut and let him get competitive, maybe I can get him to run with me some more ...

 

[Bare Lee]

This is how my wife gets me to do stuff. Works like a charm.

Then you guys aren't doing it right. She should want it just as much as you.

 

[Agnesd]

Then you guys aren't doing it right. She should want it just as much as you.

LOL!!!!

 

[Last Place Jason]

Then you guys aren't doing it right. She should want it just as much as you.

She's getting her cake and eating it, too, so to speak.

 

[migangelo]

man, you white guys. i like to cook but i will NEVER be with a woman who can't or won't cook. NEVER.

 

[rickwhitelaw]

Wow, Agnesd, sorry for the thread hijack. Looks like it's working already, action is better that words in this case. Keep doing what you are doing and he will ditch those Brooks soon.

Putting serious cap on now: Tristan is right, what are his injuries, are they serious, could they become serious if he keeps trying to catch you in his anchors?

Cap off: I have a "friend" that shops, cooks, and then cleans up after including the dishes. What would he be? Hey, single guys have to do that.

 

[Bare Lee]

Hey, single guys have to do that.

Necessity is the mother of inventing the best way to your own heart.

 

[Zetti]

Necessity is the mother of inventing the best way to your own heart.

Or like my mom says......Mothers are the necessity of invention